CASE 6

CASE OF MRS. P. J.

12:48

Female, 40 years, Teacher by profession, consulted me 24/7/2002 for Hyperthyroidism with restlessness and shivering in heart and no sense of well being..

TRANSCRIPTION

D: Tell me about your problems?
P: Jus now, I have this problem of Thyroid. Just now, the reports are normal. But I am not feeling well. Shivering in my heart, legs, I feel restless. In morning, when I get up, I can't feel fresh. First problem, Doctor. told me to take Neomercozole. 3 years back, I went to Doctor Pai. All blood test everything was done. T3, T4, TSH normal. So, he advised me tp tale Neomercazole 3 tablets a day. And now, I am taking half. I take half tablet, some swelling comes on my face, acidity is also a problem. Then also I am not feeling. Neck is swollen. I am a teacher, so I have to talk. When I come back to home, I am very tired. That's why I want to take Homoeopathic to cure all these things.
D: So, which one bothers you more?
P: Neck gland is becoming bigger, expanded. All says that what happened to your neck and all. And tiredness is my main problem. Even by taking 1 tablet, reports say me normal level. But I am feeling not normal.
D: I am not feeling well, normal?
P: After sleep, also I like to sleep more. I want more sleep. Even 7-7.30. If I wake up, I feel I should sleep for more than half an hour. Even just now also, pais are there in my legs.
D: Not feeling well?
P: It is not sufficient for me.
D: So, what is the problem?
P: All my hands, everything gets start paining only. Always, I do my work, I do job, doing all household work. But not fresh.
D: Something not fresh?
P: Means tiredness. Boys, children watch T. V. that noise I can't take it. Back pain, legs. I was doing tuition. But now I have told that girl not to come. I can't take her studies and all. I can't do that.
D: How does that feel to you?
P: Actually, I am interested in teaching, but now my health does not accept it. It is not good. To tell something that does not come and that feels guilty to me. I don't want to take even that single one tablet, allopathic because so long, just now I am 40 years.
D: Tell me about this guilt feeling?
P: If I promise somebody, yesterday also when your Compounder asked me, whether you are coming, I said definitely I am coming there. I am not like that person for just to say something and throw it away. I am taking seriously. Every work I am doing is with all my efforts [12:54]. I work very sincerely. So naturally, I feel last year I was taking tuitions for her. Now, she is in Xth Std. If I am somewhere less, she should not suffer, it is my feeling.
D: I am somewhere less?
P: If she is average child, so 3-4 hours I should provide to her. That much I can't do. All my other duties are also there, my children's education. So there I can't do any compromisation. Somewhere I have to compromise because of over exertion. So, I told her better use some both else, but I'll not take [12:55] this responsibility on me.
Q: You said you have other duties. What are your main duties?
P: Preparing food, all household work, taking tuitions, I have 2 children, one is in 11th Std. Other one is in 5th. So, I have to look after their education, studies and all. And my husband is working. So, I have to do all Roties, everything I have to prepare. Everything after only my children go for college. I have to do my work and then I go for my work.
D: When you say 'I won't take your responsibility', what do you mean?
P: If she gets less mark, I should not feel that because of me, she got less marks. If she gets less mark, because of you, then I can't bear.
D: Tell me about this?
P: She should not get less marks. If I am making all efforts, it's OK. If she gets less mark, I'll hurt somewhere.
D: What is this 'hurt' feeling?
P: Tears will start. I'll feel hurt. If something happens to me, tears come in my mind.
D: What you will feel?
P: It will hurt me. Because, I feel somewhere I am less. I have not given her proper time. Like that, I'll feel
D: Where else in your life, you felt you are somewhere less?
P: Actually, what happens that I am trying my best. But sometimes what happens, even in exhibition, in my education, I have not got how much I want. I haven't failed. But I haven't got distinction and all. Nowadays, I am participating in all science Exhibition. I do my best. But sometimes, I get 2nd prize. I feel I didn't get 1st prize. But even all of them come to me, they appreciate it. That is my drawback. I like to take prizes and all, but not getting.
D: Directly, I won't get the prize but my students will get the prize. So, actually, my school, as a teacher, I am the best out of all. My students are getting prizes but I am not getting the prize.
[13.08]
D: How does that less feeling, describe that?
P: I should try best.
D: What is lacking in you?
P: I am not able to express it properly. There are so many ideas in my mind, but I can't express it compared to others some sort of nervousness. Just now, I am coming here, that was in my mind that I was supposed to speak in English. I should speak, I have come here.
D: If you can't speak?
P: What will happen. I'll adjust to it, but I think I should not be a loser.
D: Explain this?
P: I have dominating nature. I don't like to be a loser. I come here. College studies I have done in English. But schooling in vernacular medium. But I can't speak. I don't have practice of speaking English. So, I don't have practice. I had done everything in English subject. But compared to you and others, I'll be able to speak or not. Little bit [13.04] nervousness. Even in exhibition, I have to explain to somebody, little bit nervousness, if anyone says, cold hands.
D: Inside what do you feel?
P: I control on my mind within 2-3 minutes. I should speak, talk but [hg] when they are coming and now I have to talk, I get little bit nervous. Whether I can speak/explain them properly, whether I'll get me or they'll like my project.
D: What is the worse fear?
P: Whether they will like it?
D: If they don't?
P: Nothing will happen. I'll not get the prize.
D: What is loser?
P: Whatever I do, in that I should be the 1st one. That is in my head.
D: Why you should be 1st?
P: Because I like to be.
D: Why? What is the difference when you don't get 1st, 2nd prize?
P: I can do, I like to do. That becomes my inspiration for next time i.e. natural thing. Next year, I can do my best. I can do it, but not with that courage. Even I have written here about my dream, i.e. what I haven't done, my children should do best in life. All other things are not in our hands. Career for my son. For my son is well education. He should be good one. Or he is in to make them compulsory that if he wants to be Engineer/Doctor. But he should be best Doctor. Because, I have not done it, it was my aim and I have not done it, out of laziness / nervousness. I don't know.
[13.08]
D: He should be best?
P: Actually, my family background is like that my brother r. Y.P. Ambdekar, he is children's specialist. He has done career. All my brothers are very well educated. Even my husband is well and VJTI. He is an engineer. So, all others are good, and I have not done it. So, I should do.
D: Otherwise if he is not best Doctor?
P: Then also its OK. I can't force him. I'll give him best advice.
D: Why?
P: Even actually, I am a teacher. I have seen so many students, having some physical/economical problems, then also they study are doing. I have all good background. Everything they have they should, they have capacity. (If capacity is not there, it is Caesium)
D: As a teacher, when you say physical/economical problems, what do you mean?
P: Some are handicapped, [13:10] They have Polio, they are really good in teaching. Many students have economical problems. They are very poor. Still they are studying in that situation. They are living in Zopadpatti. (Slums), In school, they are giving some food facility. They are really good in education. So, if they do, so my child should do.
D: Coming back to you, have capacity, and not done it, how does that feel?
P: Very guilty, but now I can't do. That time has gone.
D: Little more guilt?
P: Physically, what happened, when I was in school, my house was far off, used to stay in Thana. I am like this since childhood so weak. I used to get tired after coming back from school. But physically, health-wise also good. No fever, nothing else, but physical capacity, stamina was less. I get tired. I get sleep, so I can't work for many hours, 3-4 hours. That time, I was getting 68 / 70%. I could manage easily. But, after that, what happened, when I started with my college and all physically I was like that only. Education was going higher and higher.
D: How does that feel physically you are tired and education is higher and higher?
P: I can't give that much time.
D: How does that feel, your condition was like? Some imagination, visual abstract?
P: Like a tortoise, a hare. Because tortoise has to [13:14] achieve that goal but he was very slow. Like that I achieved hard earned. But not with success.
D: Guilt feeling, because of physically less capacity you could not achieve?
P: That is my nature. I never, I spoke to my husband (H) this is not good, this should not happen, I could get success or not. I can frankly speak to my (H). I can never tel all these things to my husband. Only, I can speak to my husband.
D: Why not others?
P: Very close to me. I am very close with my husband and not with others. All others having their problems, so why should I tell others. All others for me. This is not a major issue. Making problem feel like that I make it as a big issue. I did not get success. I think it is a major problem for me.
D: You said that swelling is visible, when others point out?
P: I should do something for this. I feel I am conscious. But when others say, that this is not looking good, something different in your physical body condition, so I should be serious with this.
D: How does that feel to you. You are different than others?
P: [13:18] I feel bad, I have seen some cancer patients, I think I should not suffer with all big problems.
D: Why are you afraid of cancer?
P: Because my neighbour was suffering from cancer last year. She is expired after 2 years of suffering.
D: Suffering, what is the sensitive issue?
P: It was not diagnosed. Two years she suffered inspite of all treatments, but it was too late. She was getting some pains in joints and somebody was having arthritis, allergy problem. She went to so many Doctors, Ayurgvedic Doctors, all remedies she tried. But she was in last moment. Then she was diagnosed that she has cancer. They have made the efforts. But it was very late. I feel I am having, in first stage, I should get the idea whether I will be able to cure it or not. It should not be the last stage, that you are not able to cure it. All diseases you can say fast diagnosis are there. All other things are there and lastly, you say it is cancer. I have heard so many things.
D: What was most sensitive thing about your neighbour's suffering? Which one was very painful to you?
P: Her health-wise, she can't even turn his body. She was having bone cancer. Nurses were there to help her out. What do you feel, I don't like to see all this things. Others are suffering. She was economically very good, was of 5 years [13.31] of age. She completed all her family duties that was the time she was going in disease in bad. So, I feel if I have some disease, it should be after 60 years.
D: When she couldn't turn from one side to other, her condition was like a?
P: Very helpless.
D: Your nature is dominating? What do you mean by that?
P: I like to do something. I do it.
D: You don't want to be a loser?
P: If my husband wanted to do something, then. If I want to do this, then I'll do it in my view. Sometimes, he has to sacrifice. But most of the time, I do the way.
D: Dreams?
P: Dreaming ® wave lines, looks like snake, just drown like this.
D: Dreams?
P: Snakes, travelling, sometimes I am falling from. Climbing somewhere and jut fal down. If I am walking somewhere and I just missed a step, that feeling. Suppose we are walking on a stair case.
D: Which floor?
P: See 4th floor, I am at 3rd floor. One missed step and I wake up by one. I miss a step I wake up. Suppose I am climbing a mountain and if I just my legs get folded and bad happens to fall, I may fall down as I miss a step. Sometimes I wake up, sometimes I go in other dream.
D: I don't follow you exactly, 1 step?
P: Shock like, body is not having balance.
D: Then I go into 2nd dream?
P: Whatever routine is happening like a film, it is gong on, somewhere I am watching T.V. going on, I am speaking with other school teachers, with children, with father. Snakes and water fall.
D: Feeling?
P: I see pictures, watching them, they don't bite me, nothing happens.
D: How do you react to animals?
P: Not too bold. If I see them in front of my eyes, I don't jump, don't even catch.
D: Which animals?
P: Cockroach, lizards, animals lion and tiger. I had taken safari ride on elephant. I am that much bold.
D: Childhood nature?
P: Easy going, normal childhood. My father, mother they always fight, they do not have understanding. Both are of different nature. They have some of speaking only. My father is hot minded not with us but with my mother. Drawback till that is in my mind. They are fighting for simple things. On one opinion, they don't come together. She is saying, I should go there and if he is saying no.
D: About your performance in school, college, any prizes?
P: OK. No. I was little shy. I was participating in dance, group dance. Individually no. I can't do solo dance. Never tried.
D: Any situation in life right from childhood where because of little mistake, you could not achieve something?
P: Matriculation. I got 2nd class. Till 0th I was having 70%. Above 60-65%. During my time, it was OK. Not great, but average student. I was happy till 9th std. But when I got this in 10th Std. I have got 58%. It upset.
D: Feeling?
P: I was nowhere now. How it happened, I don't know. Because I have done.
D: No where?
P: Such a less mark. I have never got.
D: Feeling?
P: Only nervousness, don't talk with anyone, not to go in crowd, can't face relatives. Not good. I never spoke with them. That was one mistake. I could not achieve whatever I want [13:33] to achieve. Matriculation, I was not dreaming about less marks. It was in matriculation only. It was big. Everyone asks marks.
D: Effect?
P: I had done. Might be mistake of Board. After 11th Std. I passed with some marks with 60%. I went from Marathi medium to English Medium. Then I could come out. Even others say that. My cousin was there, she got 75%. Next Std. She got 2nd class.
D: Menstrual history?
P: Normal.
D: Thermal?
P: Can't tolerate cold.
D: Major illness?
P: Thyroid detected in '99. Tonsillitis was my problem in childhood. Asthama '96. After thyroid problem allergy went out. I want to become fresh and this problem cured.

UNDERSTANDING

I was thinking of 6th line because of her feeling of guilt, responsibility, achievements, domineering nature, full of power, control, need to be best, etc.

Because of her handicapped and shy feeling, I was thinking more towards left side of 6th line of P.T.

She decides clearly for e.g. she said to my compounder "definitely I am coming there". In another instance, when asked her feeling about not getting 1st or 2nd prizes, she replied "I can do it but not with that courage".

She also feels "she has capacity but less (so, Caesium was ruled out).

Baryta is unable to take responsibility but our patient takes it upto certain extent. Her conflict was she decides clearly but feels capacity is less as described by her in the story of Tortoise and Hare, where Tortoise could achieve the goal but slowly (she accepts her slow capacity).

In the dream also, she missed the step while going upto 4th floor, and she reaches upto 3rd floor. I.e. began to climb but half way stuck. Sense of failure is also seen in the case.

Scholten mentions under Hafnium - The beginning of power, failure at start of business etc., Dreams of falling, swelling sensation (physical level) etc.

So I prescribed her Haffnium 200 one dose.

Follow up after 6 months:

Feels fresh, gets good sleep. Mood is better. No pain. .No complain in heart. Restlessness and tiredness decreased a lot (almost disappeared). No acidity. Feels amelioration in general. Neomarcazole dose was reduced to half. Definitely she could appreciate her changes in the state.